Visualizing the Otherside

When people ask me how I connect to the Otherside, I have to find a way to make them see what I see. It took me a long time to get to a description that seems to fit the best. 

Imagine having a handful of soap bubbles, like when you do the dishes. Now, imagine each soap bubble is its own dimension, having its own beings, its own laws of physics and so on. Then, surround each soap bubble with a fog, so that no one bubble has visual access to another. For all intents and purposes, they become invisible to one another, but they are still there.

What I am able to do is go into the fog, meet those from the other soap bubbles who can do the same, and communicate. I learn from them, I study them, and they study me as well, I believe. We have an understanding, you could say.

Going into that fog is just a step in; I cannot go through all the way. The only time Humans are allowed to go through the fog is at our Death, which is merely a beginning of a new life in a new soap bubble. For me, the Otherside is composed of all the soap bubbles that there are, and there are many. We are so small, and such simple beings. There are things in the fog that are beautiful and magical for me. I cannot recall a time before I had access to it, before it called to me. 

When I enter the fog to understand paranormal events or to talk to those who have passed, I have to be allowed in. This is where I believe a thinning occurs. Most people in the paranormal world call it a portal, but I believe that "thinning" is a better term. A portal is a way through to another side, and while the Othersiders do have access to come through the thinnings to our little soap bubble, we cannot use the portal in the same way. But, it is just an argument in semantics after all. We cannot go through until the end of our journey here. 

For me, the fog is a comfortable place, where I feel safe and secure. I don't believe that I can be harmed there, and the fear one feels is often their downfall in an active paranormal environment. No one should try to play with the paranormal or attempt to interact if you don't know what you are doing. You can make a situation worse if you don't know what you are dealing with.

All My Life

I honestly don't recall a time in my life when I didn't know the paranormal. I recall being maybe 3 years old and being completely aware of the Otherside. I jumped in and out of the fog quite naturally even then. At 4, it was my first UFO sighting. When I was 6, my mother got cancer, and suddenly I was in hospitals seeing the people who 'weren't really there' and wondering why anyone would want to stay in a hospital after they were dead. I saw the energies around my mother, her 'angels' I believe, and the night before she died, I was told that it was coming. I can't really talk about how I knew, but since that night, I've always known when someone was going to pass. In every case, I get 3-4 days' notice, but with my mother and my father, it was the night before. I knew what was coming. I crawled into bed with my dad that night because I wanted to be there for him when the phone rang. I was only 8, but I was so much more aware than anyone gave me credit for being. The night before my father passed, I knew, and he was an entire continent away from me. It was an awful night of just waiting for the phone call. As I age, I often fear the worst about who it will be next, but often it's a celebrity or someone I haven't spoken to in years. Many times I'll dream about the specific person close to the time of their passing as well. 

There have been some paranormal moments I won't speak about at all, and then there is my favorite. Not long after my mother passed, my dad and I moved into an old plantation house with my older sister and her family. I shared a bedroom with my younger niece and nephew. We had a huge fireplace in our room that would always be lit somehow when it got too cold, and I would be the one yelled at for it. It wasn't me. Then one night, an old man in a brown suit and hat walked into my room to the foot of the bed, tipped his hat to me, walked around the bed and straight through a locked door that led to a room packed to the rafters with boxes and items. That apparition stands out to me more than any other I've seen. 

As I got older, into my teens, I started noticing that paranormal things happened in another house I was living in. This time, it was nasty stuff. Things were thrown, reflections in windows and mirrors, footsteps, loud bangs, it was constant and very annoying. It was worst when I was home alone, like it was tormenting me. I was 15 when I went to the library and started to study the paranormal, reading everything I could get my hands on, from mythology to ghost stories, the Satanic Bible and various religious texts, all to gather information on the Otherside. I wanted to understand what I had known all my life. It led to a lifetime of studying that continues today. 

I could write volumes about my paranormal experiences, readings I've done, and so on, but that's for another time. I just wanted to share a bit of how ingrained into my life the paranormal world really is. 

Spirits? Ghosts? A little explanation goes a long way...

GHOST- A ghost is a remnant. It is illogical, unthinking, and is made from the emotions of a person. If you think about humans, we are basically emotional beings and spiritual beings. Those 2 parts make up a huge piece of who we are. A ghost is the emotional energy left behind of a person. It may act out, it may make sounds or act as if it's intelligent, but it's reacting and acting on emotions alone. Much like an immature child, it can act out in ways that may seem wicked, but often are just emotional outbursts in an attempt to reach out to the living.

Imagine if you will that you're walking down the street minding your own business. Suddenly, from behind a gun is put to your head and you are shot, murdered, and die in the street. You would have an immediate emotional reaction larger than most any you've had before. Those emotions could remain behind, causing havoc, trying to understand, trying to make sense of what happened. Your soul, or spirit, however, could have gone on into the light and passed on.

This doesn't mean we should react with emotions, however. Overly emotional investigators often make the emotional ghost presence even more emotional and it can turn on you quickly. Calm and understanding are incredibly important when dealing with ghostly presences.

SOUL/SPIRIT- I think these are the same thing. The soul or spirit is the core of a person. It is who we are, down inside of us. Your soul is what makes you, you! Sometimes, people die leaving behind something undone, or they stay behind after a crime to attempt to solve it. Often, spirits can leave the Otherside and visit us here in our dimension or come into the fog between dimensions and speak to us. Souls/spirits have control, they can communicate intelligently, they can interact like humans in many ways. Treat them with respect as you would any other person. 

The OTHERS- Of course, we have other beings that can act, react, and never show themselves. Some of these are intelligent, many are in fact, but some, like poltergeists, often have causes that show no logic, no intelligence, they just manifest and cause havoc. Those situations are separate from the issue of ghosts vs. spirits. 

Black as Pitch and Wearing a Suit

It's dark, and you're laying there in bed trying to sleep. You open your eyes and see the shape of a man, but in the shadows. Maybe you've seen a quick, rushing blob, darker than the darkness around it. Maybe what you're seeing is simply an Othersider, a being from a realm that leaves us seeing them in blackness, an overwhelming blend of colors all leading to a deep, inky void. They are the investigators of the Otherside.

In our simple human nature, blackness is scary, especially when it's late and you can't sleep. We are trained to see black as bad, satanic, or of negative energy. To me, black is a beautiful color, not the lack thereof, as many think. White is actually the absence of color. Black is a blend of all colors. This negative association with the color black is an old defense mechanism from the times when seeing blackness that was darker than the night meant you could fall to your death or be eaten by what was hiding within. As I once heard Barry Fitzgerald say, "I'm not afraid of the dark. I'm afraid of what's in it." I suppose that's a safe way to live.

So we have beings who will, because of our inability to see a large part of the light spectrum, appear black or dark to us. Human eyes- they are imperfect in many ways, but that doesn't mean these are malevolent beings. They are simply from somewhere else, and they appear as just another color in our limited sight. That doesn't make them bad, and in my experience, they are quite the opposite. I believe they are as curious about us as we are them, and it's possible that we appear black to them. I don't know. What I do know is that they are studying us much like we study them. They do speak out and ask for us to return the favor. They are the paranormal investigators of their realm. We'll call them The Investigators. Why not, right? I love catchy names. :) They will come around more if you talk to them, if you tell them you're willing to help, just like I do when someone from the Otherside comes to me willing and eager to help! So, please, don't egg them on just to test them. That would piss off any good investigator!

Then we have The Blobs. I call them this because they are just untamed balls of energy, usually without any reason to be. They are made of energy and emotions (usually unhappy ones), and have no real intelligence or ability to do much at all on purpose. Sometimes they flit around a place, and they are known to scare folks in late night bathroom trips (hubby had this happen!). They may make noise or knock things around, but usually they are harmless. However, there are some that are made of very negative emotions, often gathered by folks who go into graveyards or haunted locations and start calling things out with no real knowledge of what they are doing. They can also build up in unhappy or abusive homes. If you are in an unhappy situation with a lot of negative emotions getting thrown around, the Blobs are likely a byproduct of your own life. These Blobs can change your moods, cause fights, even create stress and anxiety or depression to build. If you notice that people are acting weird or seem to be more unhappy than usual and the Blobs are around, it might be important to seek out someone to clear the space and cleanse the person. Now and then we all need a good spiritual washing and so do our homes! Of course, don't put up with abuse or unhappiness. This life is far too short to be miserable.

The final type of Shadow is what I call a Watcher. Now, this is a term I've used all my life because this is what I was told they were, and when I found a Biblical link to the term during my studies as a religious history student, I felt both vindicated and shocked. I've had Watchers since I was small; I was 8 when I first saw the first one and in my pre-teens when the second appeared. They're tall, black as pitch, and one wears a robe, the other a suit of sorts from what I can tell. In both the books of Daniel and Enoch, Watchers are mentioned. They are angels that come from heaven to watch over certain humans. They are both fallen and unfallen. I have one of each because of my work with the Othersiders. I have one who teaches me and guides me to save me from becoming overwhelmed with working in the darkness of the Otherside. The other comes to tell me of impending death, usually 3-4 days in advance of the passing of someone I know. As I've mentioned before, I knew the night before both my mother's and my father's deaths, and they were the only ones whose names I was told. The others come in those few days, but I never know who it'll be until after they're gone. This has happened so many times I have lost count.

I'll tell you that it's very nice to have my main Watcher available to me when I need some assistance. He works well with my main Teacher, and they give me a great deal of comfort! My death-notice Watcher, well, I don't like to see him. His signs are plain and unmistakable. When he first appeared the night before my mother died, he taught me what I would need to know to bear this my entire life. It's the most difficult part of my work- seeing the sign and knowing there's nothing I can do but wait for news of who has passed.

I know that many (most) people see these Shadow beings as malevolent, dangerous and frightening, but I can tell you they are not. Even with the Blobs, the negative energy is the result of the actions of the living, not the dead. Watchers are there to aid us, to literally keep watch over us, to come when we are in need. My main Watcher works in my dreams with me, just like they did with Nebuchadnezzar. If I ask him to leave, he does. We have mutual respect. Even my dark Watcher comes peacefully to deliver the news. Fear is a choice you make. If you have no reason to fear, you can remain calm and learn. If you learn, you grow. You don't have to be afraid of the dark, and you don't even have to be afraid of all the things in it. Personally, I'm much more afraid of random spider webs than Shadows!

Past Lives and this Life's Lessons

For many years, I've been a firm believer in past lives. I just never have believed that one life is enough for us to really learn what it means to be humans. In fact, I have proof. Ok, it's proof to me.

Many years ago when I was married to my first husband, I had an incredibly realistic dream. In it, I was in 14th century England watching the man I loved die at the end of a sword. It was devastating, and when I woke up, there was a feeling of an actual physical void in my chest. I felt empty. I knew there was someone out there for me, that this man was out there. My husband and I had a lot of problems, and it wasn't long after the dream that I asked for a divorce, and it was granted rather quickly. Not much longer after that, I met someone on a BBS (before the internet) and we started talking. It was Nathan. And instantly I felt connected to him. He came over a couple days after our first phone call, and it was love at first sight. I had felt as if the hole in my soul was suddenly filled. When I placed my hand over the spot where I saw him run through in my dream, there was a slight mark, and it was incredibly cold.

As time went on and we talked more about it, we realized we had very similar dreams, down to his unique and unusual name in that previous life. There were details about things he could not have guessed, and I just felt more and more close to him. The moment I looked him in the eyes, I knew he was the one I'd been waiting for, because the emptiness of nearly 3 years was gone. I had been divorced 6 months and 4 days when we met, and he had a 6 month rule. It was perfect timing.

Since the moment we met, we've discovered other lives we've lived together. I've always loved him, since before history was written down for prosperity's sake. I've learned of lives with both my sons as well, and have been amazed to recognize my beautiful mama in another life as well. I'm grateful for this amazing blessing. I think everyone should work to learn about their past lives. I have learned more about myself in this life with the more work I've put into finding about my past lives. Don't be afraid. Here's a recording to help with regression that I really love to use, and feel like it's an excellent regression for beginners.

Let yourself open up to learning more about your past. We are a conglomeration of many lifetimes, many lessons, and many loves. It really is quite amazing to find out about those with whom you've lived before.


“Have you ever met someone and felt like you've known them forever?” 
― Michelle Madow, Remembrance

Dreaming 101

Dreams are the brain’s way of helping us work out our issues. They give us storylines that provide us with solutions we’d never think of on our own, without the help of our subconscious and unconscious. Dreams are also able to bring us visitors from the Otherside, often loved ones who have messages for us. Dreams can give us premonitions, from what our coworkers will be wearing the next day, to larger events, like earthquakes and other natural disasters.

Very often, people contact me about their dreams, and they're regularly amazed at how accurately I can explain their dreams to them, how well their dreams fit their situations, and how thoroughly their dreams create answers to their dilemmas. It is quite common that people have those “Aha!” moments when hearing about their dream meanings. It's also not uncommon that nightmares have very non-scary explanations. What we're afraid of is often what we dream of, and that actually helps us deal with those fears!

Some of the most common dreams are about specific animals, which often indicate a person’s totem animal. This is a guide for you in life, and it often comes to bring you a very important message. In virtually all cultures around the world, various animals have significance in dreams and in spirituality. Depending on your culture, different animals will bring different messages. For example, in Native American cultures, wolves are messengers. Dreaming about a wolf can mean that you need to pay attention to its message to you. Each dream they appear in will have some meaning to decipher.

I love to get messages from people telling me about their dreams. After all, I’m called the Dreaming Medium, so dreams are obviously a huge part of my life and work! Deciphering your own dreams isn't very difficult, however. There are lots of websites you can go to if you just Google “dream dictionary” and hit any link; there will be many. If you have a certain cultural aspect you want to explore, just add that to the search. I could add any of thousands of sites here, but I think the average person can use Google, and I prefer to teach a man to fish, if you know what I mean.

For me, dreams come to tell me so many things. I often learn of people who have just passed or are about to pass, and I've often spoken to the departed. I have dreamt in advance of great disasters, including tsunamis, floods and earthquakes. I dream of things about 3-4 days or months in advance of most things. In the case of the missing Malaysia flight, I woke up from a dream of being on a plane in crisis to turn on the TV and see a report of the flight gone missing. My dreams are constantly reminding me to listen to them, as I regularly get really good insight on things from them.

I hope that you will listen to your dreams. Keep a dream diary next to your bed with a pen, and just scribble what you recall on the page when you wake up. Don’t worry about being neat; the idea is to just get down enough to help you recall the dream later. Most people wake up and quickly forget their dreams.  That doesn't mean we don’t learn from them; remember that our subconscious is always working. However, being able to actively recall our dreams gives us access into that sleep-time state our brains get into, and a diary can help you find patterns and answers you might want to keep in the conscious mind.

Sleep well tonight, and pay attention to your dreams! I’d love to hear about them! Let me know on Facebook what you're dreaming about!

“I find out a lot about myself by sleeping. Dreams, they are who I am when I’m too tired to be me.” 
― Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale

                                                                                                                                                                                

I should have been called Clair!

Ok, I'm totally not a Clair. However, I have a lot of the 'clair-' abilities. First, let's begin by listing them and what they entail.

Clairaudience- the ability to hear in a paranormal manner. An example is when a medium is able to hear the voices of an Othersider.

Clairvoyance- the ability to see in a paranormal manner. This can include the ability to see Othersiders that are not visible to most people. It also includes being able to see details about a person or place. When I work on cases of missing persons, I use this particular 'clair-' to see a variety of details.

Clairsentience- the ability to obtain paranormal information through feeling or touch. Often I am able to feel in my body areas, illnesses and health needs that are notable in others.

Clairalience- the ability to obtain paranormal information through smell. This is also called clairolfactance. One example of this was when I was on a case and smelled smoke. The client said that a house on the property had burned down many years before.

Claircognizance- a 'knowing' without explanation. Have you ever been able to do something you'd never done without really knowing how you did it? That's the 'knowing' of this 'clair-' and mediums are often labeled as claircognizant.

Clairgustance- the ability to obtain paranormal information through taste. This is an unusual one.

I've experienced all of these except clairgustance, at least as far as I can remember. I often smell things related to people who have passed or events that have happened. I regularly read people and have a 'knowing' about them and can see clear details in many cases of things that have happened or are coming.

I believe many people have one or more of these 'clair-' abilities, but overlook them. Pay attention to the things you are sensing and experiencing, and you might realize you're more of a Clair than you thought!

Lucid Dreaming: Just a Beginning

When I was 14 I first learned about the concept of lucid dreaming. Put simply, lucid dreaming is where one falls into a dream state and yet has control over the events in the dream. In this state, a person can learn about themselves, speak with those who have passed on, stop nightmares, and more.

Keith Hearne was the first to scientifically discover lucid dreaming. Through various experiments, he was able to prove that lucid dreaming occurred, and that it could be influenced. He even patented a 'dream machine' in the 1980s. You can download his book on the machine and his research here. Among the earliest statements of being conscious in a dream came from writings in the late 1800s. Of course, prior to that, there is no doubt that dreamers took control of their own sleeping worlds.

Paul Tholey, a dream specialist (called an oneirologist), says there are things that must be in place to be considered a lucid dream. One must be aware of the following things: the dream state, the ability they have to make decisions, memories, personal identity, the dream world, the meaning of the dream and one must be concentrating and focused and have subjective clarity in that focus.

It sounds like a lot, but it's really not. They all fall together. Once you are aware you're in the dream, you often jump right into decision-making, finding yourself in space and figuring out where you are, and you instantly want to know what it all means.

There are a couple of ways to just kind of fall in to a lucid dream, either by simply going from being in a conscious state right into REM sleep, or by getting into a normal dream and then realizing it's a dream. Getting started with a dream and then realizing I'm in it is the method I typically use on purpose, but I have often fallen directly into a lucid dream thinking I was still awake. You have to take quick account of your surroundings in that situation!

I won't go into all the science behind it, but if you're more interested, Google J. Allan Hobson or Stephan LaBerge. They can take you deeper into the neuroscience than I can. I know how to do it, but I'll be dipped if I know how to explain the brain's way of doing it!

Now that I'm thinking about it, I'm going to do this in several parts. This is part 1. Basics. What to expect. That's enough. So, in addition to the general info I've told you so far, here are some things to do/remember till next time.

1. You have nothing to fear. I get asked all the time if it's dangerous. Not in the least. It's incredibly enjoyable, incredibly cathartic. I have learned more in my lucid dreams about myself, my past lives and my gifts than I ever have in the waking world.

2. It takes time. You must practice. You must wait for it. It's instant for a few, and those folks are blessed. It took me about 4-5 years of really working to get it down to be able to get into my nightmares. Those for me were the hardest thing. Nightmares, if you have bad ones, will be tough. You can often come out of them, when they've been lucid, feeling like you've been beaten up. It's not easy to make every dream a lucid one, nor is it necessary.

3. No one can take over your dreams. There are Dreamwalkers, and we'll get into those later, but for now just know that you are in control of your body, your mind, your brain, your dreams. You're the boss, applesauce!!

4. There are many paths to reach the same destination. You may find one method works for you very well and others don't work at all. That's ok. We're all different, unique, and we all need to find the path that works best for us.

5. Now, get yourself to the store and pick up a good thick notebook or 2 and a package of pens and prepare to start writing down every dream you recall. It may be bits and pieces, but those will help you to recall more. Now, put one on the bedside table and one by the toilet. We all get up at night to pee, and usually come out of a dream to do so. Write. Write. Write. Notice things that seem to recur, things you see over again, people you recognize, et cetera.

If you have questions about dreams, please send them to me and I'll see what I can do to help you figure them out.

The next article will include methods to start lucid dreaming. At the beginning, it's most important to become really aware of what you are dreaming about, and how those dreams make you feel when you wake from them.

Email me if you have questions on this article. More to come soon! I promise!